Don’t lose yourself in your children even if they think our lives solely revolve around them. Remember when you use to think your parents fell out of the sky “old and lame?” Now you are the “old and lame” person according to your kids. I am mindful when it comes to my kids. I have learned to ask before I post something and while I threaten to embarrass them, I rarely deliver on those promises.
While parenthood demands lifestyle changes, don’t lose what makes you unique. Besides, losing yourself in your children is not only bad for you, but it also restricts their growth. Little things bring me joy, for example:
- Falling in love with words that are no longer cool
- Seeing my children’s horrified face when I threaten to dance in public
- My husband and me displaying public display of affection (PDA)
#1 Saying “Gangsta”
When I say “gangsta,” it adds excitement to my day. I am a workaholic. It feels good to make progress, but “work” can get mundane. I love to find ways to put life into my tasks. For example, I may focus on the skills I’m acquiring. Cooking — gangsta. Working — gangsta. Project Managing — gangsta. Volunteering — gangsta. Blogging — GANGSTA! The fact it bothers my kids is a bonus!
I cannot twerk, but I can fake it. I enjoy threatening to twerk more than I enjoy the dance move itself. My kids usually leave the room, or bow their heads in shame as they tell me, “No, Mom.” I love dancing. It burns calories, lowers stress, and increases joy. All three benefits are healthy, and it connects with the person I was before kids. Plus, it’s pretty gangsta!
#3 PDA around the house
My husband and I have been married for almost 23 years, and I still have the biggest crush on him. He loves affection and praise; I love giving him both. Hubby and I believe in public display of affection (PDA) around the house … a peck, hug, or pat are all fair game. My kids do not always appreciate our love. I do not want to lose our love just because we have minor children. Besides, most of our kids are either adults or close to it. PDA is here to stay.
Don’t Lose Yourself
Don’t lose what makes you unique. It serves as an example to your kids, and it reminds people why they love you. Most of all it maintains your sense of self.
Losing yourself is a gradual process. You may not notice until you are in trouble so make your you take care. You don’t have to make self-care expensive or extravagant. Joy is in the simple so even if my children don’t understand my list, I have at least three things I won’t give up in 2014.